Call me a cliche.
Although, an apt start to my first post i might add. Borrowing a frequently used yet, mildly refreshing idea from one of those movies where you see our protagonist beginning on his long overdue assignment and ends up scribbling our most famous article - 'The'.
This post isn't about my absolute lack of an idea for a post. No. This post is about, well if you haven't guessed yet, 'The'.
Before you come to any conclusions, I am not the editor of any textbook on grammar and I am most definitely not Homer Simpson. I am a newbie, a noob if i may say to the art of blogging. Funny thing really, I never thought i'd go this far with a post, nonetheless my first.
To kick start this subconsciously written article on an article, I think it's only fair and just to start with 'An'.
'The' is quite the special one amongst it's co-articles. 'The' can be used anywhere and with almost every noun. How cool is that? You don't need a set of rules to be followed, like in the case of 'an'. Think of it from 'an' 's perspective. That poor sod has to end up before a word starting with a vowel always. That's like wearing the same underwear everyday. Not cool.
You may argue that 'a' has it easier - there are those dimwits who use 'a' in places where an 'an' ought to be used - something quite common with the every day Indian. It just isn't dignified, personal or remotely interesting when pitted against 'The'. 'The' is definite. 'A' is notably pauper-like. Why? The is a title, the likes of which only a few people have had an impact on the world to have been endowed with (or stupid enough). 'The' gives you that license to stamp your difference in the world.
To begin with, we could start with those title-holders with the simple 'The'.
The Buddha - He didn't sit under a tree for nothing.
The Zohan - weird - Don't know what this asshole did.
The Pope - 'A' Faggot.
The Godfather - 'An' old man with throat cancer.
Then come some of the groups / bands.
The Dirty Dozen - A bunch of lunatics who killed Nazis for a living
The Inglorious Basterds - A rip off of the Dirty Dozen. Double the lunacy.
The Eagles - Sponsored and Promoted a certain 'Hotel California'
The Beatles - The only good thing to come from Liverpool.
Then come those with a 'the' title succeeding their names.
Alexander The Great - Addict. Horse-lover. Conqueror. Conquered every piece of land he trod on - so much so that when he died, he could call the place home.
Henry The Eighth - The Eighth one to screw her over. They had a count those days.
Jack The Ripper - Sent Heads rolling.
Sinbad The Sailor - I was really disappointed with this one. The sailor - a title? really. They couldn't get more creative?
Michael Jackson - The King of Pop - Man in the mirror. Looked at himself and made a change. (Black to White)
And finally those who deserve a 'The'
The Tendulkar - _/|\_
The Michelangelo - Sculpted and painted nude people.
The Calvin - He threatened to transmogrify me.
The Jack Nicholson - You can't handle the truth.
The Yoda - Lived 900 years he did.
The Spock - Lived Long and prospered \\//
The John Lennon - Imagined and was shot dead. (The Sardar's have reason to worry.)
The Homer (Simpson) - D'Oh!
The Chuck Norris - There isn't anything he can't do.
The Rajinikanth - He beat Chuck Norris. (at everything)
The Vijay - Did the one thing they (Chuck and Rajni) couldn't do - Fail at everything.
So yeah, 'The' is sort of special as you can see. It deserves a tribute.
Hell! There's a reason why thefacebook is now Facebook.
That said.
'The' End.
